One thing we all know, that those of us that were once patients, we understand the needs of those we are caring for. As the patient you have to be able to ask for help and tell others what you want and need. Let go of the tasks that you can, people are willing to help. In fact you are doing a favor for others when you ask for help. There is nothing that another person wouldn't do for you if only you ask. If you take care of yourself then you may have more energy for the things you want to do and you in fact may stay healthier. Those around you will actually feel less guilty if you take the time to ask and there may be tasks and skills that another helper could actually do better than you so, don't hesitate. Those things that are within the boundaries could include: cooking, cleaning, shopping, yard work, childcare, or even eldercare or taxi. They may be able to take you to a doctor appointment or pick up your child or find information you need. As the caregiver you may also help with the emotional needs of the patient by fielding phone calls and visits to when the patient is able to talk or visit and you may be able to keep others informed. The other thing is, that if someone says no that is ok too. They may not have the time right now or may not know how to help or they may not be able to cope with what is going on in their lives. Sometimes people just feel uneasy around others who are sick but know that they still care, they just may not be able to help at this time. The last thing I want to add is as a caregiver you must take care of yourself. All those hours driving, sitting at appointments etc. can take a toll, be active, still connect with friends, give yourself some time off and find nice things you can do for yourself. I find dancing in the kitchen when no one is watching is a good way to left off steam and really laugh. Can you imagine if my oven could talk what it would say? Making it great. S
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AuthorMy name is Sue Kilburn and I am a clinical nurse breast cancer educator at the Yolanda G. Barco Oncology Institute in Meadville, Pennsylvania. Archives
March 2015
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