This Easter I celebrated life, I am exhausted but a good type of exhaustion. We shared some time with friends that are dealing with significant health issues and I made a pot of homemade potato soup and delivered it and took some Easter gifts around and then got in the car and headed to Rochester to spend some quality time with my son and his wife and my precious granddaughter. It was a whirlwind trip and every moment was packed and I would not have missed it for anything. I think PA and I did learn that we are getting older and it takes us a bit longer to regroup after the trip and I am heading to NC this weekend to visit my other grandchildren that I have not seen since Thanksgiving. I miss not having them all at home and the hustle and bustle of it all but I will take what I can get. The only time that we can all get together anymore would be for a wedding or funeral and other than that the only other opportunity is Grandma Camp. This has become a tradition that grandkids come to Grandma's and we have a week of fun. The parents gather as well and we have campfires and Smores and Smears( with peanut butter), we fish and swim and kayak and just spend quality time and of course Grandma is exhausted after that as well but it is a good type of exhaustion. Now you get my drift, whatever time I have and none of us have the crystal ball on that one, I want to enjoy every moment and when I am exhausted I want it to be the good type of exhaustion and to make it count. The grandkids, hopefully will have memories of these times and the laughter and fun. You can't wait for fun and laughter to come to you, you have to make your own and if you aren't in the moment and can't seem to find the reserve, then you force yourself until it is fun and you can laugh at yourself or others. Trust me, there are enough things to be miserable about in life and my choice is to laugh and even if I am a little crazy, our time is better spent smiling than complaining. I think if you could ask my kids some of the crazy moments at home growning up-one would include the whipped cream fight in the front lawn where everyone had their own can of whipped cream and we just went after each other. It had been a tense day and that certainly broke the moment but I will warn you to wash your clothes as soon as your done or it turns to sour milk smell very rapidly. We made our bad day good by laughter and even though we were exhaI hope your Easter was also a good type of exhaustion and that you are making each day the best.
Those of you that have experienced cancer treatment know what I mean when sometimes it i feels like it is just too much effort to breathe. I remember those days vividly. I was just too tired, mentally and physically and every way you can think of for anything more than just the essentials. I was too tired to sleep and too tired to think or focus and too tired to read a book, eat, or do anything but exist. Breathing at times was an effort, not like having a cold or anything, just too exhausting.
This Easter I celebrated life, I am exhausted but a good type of exhaustion. We shared some time with friends that are dealing with significant health issues and I made a pot of homemade potato soup and delivered it and took some Easter gifts around and then got in the car and headed to Rochester to spend some quality time with my son and his wife and my precious granddaughter. It was a whirlwind trip and every moment was packed and I would not have missed it for anything. I think PA and I did learn that we are getting older and it takes us a bit longer to regroup after the trip and I am heading to NC this weekend to visit my other grandchildren that I have not seen since Thanksgiving. I miss not having them all at home and the hustle and bustle of it all but I will take what I can get. The only time that we can all get together anymore would be for a wedding or funeral and other than that the only other opportunity is Grandma Camp. This has become a tradition that grandkids come to Grandma's and we have a week of fun. The parents gather as well and we have campfires and Smores and Smears( with peanut butter), we fish and swim and kayak and just spend quality time and of course Grandma is exhausted after that as well but it is a good type of exhaustion. Now you get my drift, whatever time I have and none of us have the crystal ball on that one, I want to enjoy every moment and when I am exhausted I want it to be the good type of exhaustion and to make it count. The grandkids, hopefully will have memories of these times and the laughter and fun. You can't wait for fun and laughter to come to you, you have to make your own and if you aren't in the moment and can't seem to find the reserve, then you force yourself until it is fun and you can laugh at yourself or others. Trust me, there are enough things to be miserable about in life and my choice is to laugh and even if I am a little crazy, our time is better spent smiling than complaining. I think if you could ask my kids some of the crazy moments at home growning up-one would include the whipped cream fight in the front lawn where everyone had their own can of whipped cream and we just went after each other. It had been a tense day and that certainly broke the moment but I will warn you to wash your clothes as soon as your done or it turns to sour milk smell very rapidly. We made our bad day good by laughter and even though we were exhaI hope your Easter was also a good type of exhaustion and that you are making each day the best.
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AuthorMy name is Sue Kilburn and I am a clinical nurse breast cancer educator at the Yolanda G. Barco Oncology Institute in Meadville, Pennsylvania. Archives
March 2015
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