I always find Mother''s day a difficult day. When the kids were little it was whatever I could make it and I knew Ron when he came into our life would fill in the pieces. He would get the kids presents to give to me and my mother -in-law always sent me flowers which I always found a bit odd. When the kids got older and away at school I would pick out mother's day cards and put them in another envelope but address the original to myself and stamp it so they could just send it back and didn't forget. Far too many times, I have sat by the phone to wait for that call just to hear my kids voices and run to the mailbox just to see if there is a card. I know they don't always say it nor do they have to but those special moments validate me in that I didn't totally screw up. It also gives me reflection later when I may not be so firm in my personal standing in life and I look back and realize I have won, not matter what life brings me now or in the future. I have happy, successful, well adjusted kids that are making their way in the world and leaving their imprint as they go. Now are we perfect, NO! We all have problems and concerns but I know each of my kids go out of their way to help others and those that are parents are amazing parents and those that aren't yet are just as great with their nieces and nephews and all other kids. I am proud of what they have become. None live close to home so Sunday will be a quiet day and I will still wait for that phone to ring and run to the mailbox to see if there is a card but really do know all I need to know. I love my kids more than anything and grandkids even more than that and there isn't anything, anywhere or anytime that I wouldn't do for any of them. I miss them, and like the butterfly that grows and flies away... they are grown and gone away and living their lives but I do love when they return to the nest to just check in and be the original family that started out so many years ago. I hope that I can leave a legacy to my family as my parents did to me.
I know they day will come that they will take my hand and help me up or down or across the street and they will have to listen to the same old stories ten times over and also to fill in the words I can't remember and maybe wipe of the food left on my chin or comb my hair for me and I hope that they will remember that I did that for them with love and that they will do the same. I can hear the Grandma stories about me already starting but that is ok, it is the circle to making it a great day. Happy Mother's Day to all of you out there.
With Love,
S