I was running through my Facebook at home recently when I fell across a post that a cancer patient had linked and others were reading and making comments on. Much of what was being said that whatever your life was before that it will be different after chemo regardless of what you are going through or what is to come. You may have had a great life before but you will have a better one as you come to know yourself and your strength and weaknesses. You will have friends, through no fault of your own that will fall off the radar and some that are just to caustic or depressing to be around and then you will also find that you have made new friends along the way. All of this is true but I often wonder how much should someone tell you or how much should you experience on your own? Your experience will not be the exact same as mine. Just as my childbirth experience was not the same as yours. I will tell you that what you are going through will be a series of ups and downs and cancer will remain part of your vocabulary from now on. You will experience life different and you will have moments that stress you out, right back to when you were first diagnosed but knowing it as familiar territory you will be better able to navigate your way through. I never tell anyone to stop crying but I will say, try to refocus your energies in a positive way. You need to cry but you also need to laugh and you need to be listened to. I can't fix what you are going through but I can be there to hold your hand. As I look over the past week of blogs and I look at the information I tried to share, I noticed the number of hits were down and is that due to the technical information or is it because you need some personal insight and to hear that things will change but it is a good change. Don't sweat stuff--- not just small stuff, just stuff! There is so very much out of your control and that is the hardest thing to do is give up that control and be faithful in your walk. Worrying does not make it better and if you focus on all that might happen you will forget to enjoy what is happening. That brings me back over and over again to being grateful. GRATEFUL! What an amazing word! Are you grateful for today? For the friends and co-workers you share each day with? Are you thankful that we had a break in bad weather and that I got a funny Facebook story from my one son and almost all the kids called yesterday and that I have great neighbors who are always there for us and now we need to stand up for them. I am grateful that I have a church family and one that I have been with almost my entire life. I am grateful for friends and family that put up with my ups and downs, I am grateful for a job that allows me to reach out to others experiencing the "C" word and maybe and hopefully make a difference. I am grateful, I have enough to eat and clean water to drink, and a husband that is with me through thick and thin. I am grateful for my home. I am grateful that I have just enough and that I can share with others that are in need when the need arises. If that means I work a few more years than anticipated then I am grateful that I have a job at this time and I can help. I can continue on but I think you get the idea. As a parent, do you want to jump out and give your child more when they are not grateful for what they have now? Reach out to others and hopefully they will look for their "gratefuls' in their lives too. Make it a great day! Now do me one favor and start a list of "Gratefuls" and you will make your own day better. Yes, I could talk to patient about all the side effects and cloud them with prognosis and outcomes but we are each of us individuals and as this medicine thing is really just a science, again- be grateful and see if you don't face each day better the more yo
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AuthorMy name is Sue Kilburn and I am a clinical nurse breast cancer educator at the Yolanda G. Barco Oncology Institute in Meadville, Pennsylvania. Archives
March 2015
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