Here my hero, my companion, my best friend was facing his own battle. I had flashbacks to my own cancer and how Duke stayed with me day and night and every trip to the bathroom and how gently he would get up or down of the bed to not disturb me. He stayed on my left side, far from the affected cancer area and listened to me cry, and laugh, and even yell sometimes. No judgement from Duke, he continued to love me. Now it became apparent it was my turn to return the favor. I could take him home but he was so uncomfortable and unable to walk without great urging and no eating. His sad eyes looked up at me and I told him how very much I loved him and held his head as the minutes passed. In my heart I knew what I had to decide for my buddy. I gently took off his harness so he felt no restriction anywhere and I just held him and kept telling him how much he meant to me. He rallied a little and even stood up. His signature was to give me a high five and I asked and he did as much as he could. He even licked my face and he is not a kisser by any means and then he layed back down. As Ron and I looked on and cried he just put his head down as if to say, this is all I can do now. The doctor was lovely and knew the pain we were in. She asked if we needed more time and we asked that she take him to his rest. My friend was going to a better place, where he can run and swim again and high five whenever he wants. As I mourn our loss of our dear friend, I also am awaiting anxiously of news of a new granddaughter that may be here any day. She will miss our gentle giant but she will definitely help to mend our hearts. So today, I must make it a great day! S
We took Duke to one vet and was told to just watch him for a couple of days, and when I got home and saw him, I knew we were in for trouble and proceeded to take him to another vet. His normal 65 pounds looked bloated and he was just weak and barely moved his head. We got there and he was only over his normal weight by two pounds. His back legs continued to shake which is not his normal and he walked across the tiled floored which is also not a usual occurence. I normally have to drag him across if there is no carpet as he doesn't like bare floors. A history was taken and an xray and blood work and then more time and another consultation and it looked like our decision would be surgery to remove a splenic tumor of which we would not know if benign or malignant until they opened him up. After reviewing the blood work a second testing of the blood work was taken as values were so low that it was felt they couldn't be right. More waiting and the doctor then came in and said Duke would not make it off the table if we did surgery due to how low his blood work was and he had no chance of survival.
Here my hero, my companion, my best friend was facing his own battle. I had flashbacks to my own cancer and how Duke stayed with me day and night and every trip to the bathroom and how gently he would get up or down of the bed to not disturb me. He stayed on my left side, far from the affected cancer area and listened to me cry, and laugh, and even yell sometimes. No judgement from Duke, he continued to love me. Now it became apparent it was my turn to return the favor. I could take him home but he was so uncomfortable and unable to walk without great urging and no eating. His sad eyes looked up at me and I told him how very much I loved him and held his head as the minutes passed. In my heart I knew what I had to decide for my buddy. I gently took off his harness so he felt no restriction anywhere and I just held him and kept telling him how much he meant to me. He rallied a little and even stood up. His signature was to give me a high five and I asked and he did as much as he could. He even licked my face and he is not a kisser by any means and then he layed back down. As Ron and I looked on and cried he just put his head down as if to say, this is all I can do now. The doctor was lovely and knew the pain we were in. She asked if we needed more time and we asked that she take him to his rest. My friend was going to a better place, where he can run and swim again and high five whenever he wants. As I mourn our loss of our dear friend, I also am awaiting anxiously of news of a new granddaughter that may be here any day. She will miss our gentle giant but she will definitely help to mend our hearts. So today, I must make it a great day! S
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AuthorMy name is Sue Kilburn and I am a clinical nurse breast cancer educator at the Yolanda G. Barco Oncology Institute in Meadville, Pennsylvania. Archives
March 2015
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